Keep your heart broken
by smaragdbird
Summary: Johnbobby songfic that sets during the final battle in X3


Keep your heart broken Enfolding your love in my heart 

_By the dawn I'll be gone_

_The road keeps us apart_

_For some time I'll be gone_

Bobby lifted John's, no Pyro's he reminded himself, unconscious body from the ground. Pyro was not particular heavy but with the soil covered with debris it was hard to walk with a man on your shoulders.

They had just reached the middle of the bridge as he felt his burden struggle. He let Pyro go. The other man stood up, rubbing his still blue hands and smiled. To say Bobby was surprised would have been an understatement.

'I knew you wouldn't have the balls to let me die.' Bobby led out a mental groan. Something like that in this situation could only come from John, only.

'Everything always is about you, isn't it?' He snapped, irritated because John took a step towards him.

'No. Only when you're concerned it is.' Another step forward. Suddenly the world seemed to burst into pieces. Bobby fell and found himself pressed against John.

'I knew you find me irresistible.' And kissed him hard as Bobby opened his mouth to protest. The kiss was as Bobby remembered it and more. John was never known to hold back but at school, at that time, he did for Bobby. But now he plundered his mouth like he owned it, pure need, pure lust. Bobby's senses were over helmed by the promises the kiss expressed.

He must have looked like… something because John said:

'Cheer up. The world's going to end in ten minutes anyway.' He began to pull Bobby's zipper down and leaned forward:

'I'm going to fuck you while the world ends.' Bobby shivered and his mouth ran dry. He knew that he shouldn't do this but nothing ever felt so right and so wrong at the same time.

His heart beat faster as he looked into John's glowing, dark eyes.

They burned as the world turned to edge of death and back again.

You promised to swallow your 

_Tears when I leave you_

_You promised to follow the_

_Leads I will give you_

_You said you would crawl in the_

_Dark from the laughter_

_You said you would long after_

_Me ever after_

Afterwards they lay in filth and dust. Bobby needed a bit to regain his consciousness but John already put his clothes back on. Bobby reached out for him.

'Don't go.'

John tuned to him.

'What?'

'Don't. Go.'

'Stop it, Iceman. You have your pretty, now touchable girlfriend. Three years ago, you made very clear that you don't want me.' For a moment Bobby thought that John looked hurt but after a half second that expression vanished and yes, he must have imagined it.

'I love you, John.' It was true; he did but sometimes love wasn't enough. Bobby cried as the other man walked further away from him. John turned around, again grinning and said:

'I know.'

_My love will grow black if your_

_Heart gets stolen_

_Just promise to keep_

_Your heart…_

_One day I'll come back if the_

_Door's still open_

_Just promise to keep _

_Your heart broken_

When he came back from Alcatraz, Bobby found himself unable to move on with his life. He couldn't forget Phoenix. He couldn't forget the battle. But above all he couldn't forget John, cocked head, grinning with 'I know.' on the lips. This pictured was burned into the inner of his eyelids. Every time he closed his eyes he saw it. An endless loop where no one could pull him out. No one but John who was somewhere and probably not wasting a single thought on Bobby.

Rogue left eventually with Logan and Bobby didn't mind. They had drifted away before this and he knew that his obsession with John is only the last reason. No broken hearts.

_Days go by like the wind_

_And this life is too short_

_It makes no sense to give in_

_To release you from _

_My thoughts_

So years went on and so did life only without Bobby. He was stuck in an endless loop of remembering John in that special moment. Bobby didn't know where John is or if he would come back but he waited and watched the world. He watched Rogue, leading a life with Logan, always on the road, always depending on 'The Cure'. He watched Kitty leaving the mansion and founding her own security firm and marrying Piotr. He watched Jubilee die of cancer. Bobby stayed in the mansion, teaching the children, occasionally leading the remaining X-Men, living in the room he had shared with John so many years ago. Storm and Hank had tried to help him but Bobby refused. He liked the little world he formed for himself and he was also not sure if had the strength to survive without it. But even in his world he felt lonely, so lonely…

I promised to write you

I'll always remember

I promised to try to be

Back 'til December

I said I must go I must face

This disaster

I said I would come after

You ever after

Bobby woke up with a feeling of loneliness he had never felt before. But the shinning sun, the smell of fresh coffee and the sound of roughly handled dishes coming from the kitchen effaced the memories of that dream. Just as he swung his feet out of the bed John looked through the open door.

'Morning. You look like shit. Bad dream?'

'It's over.' Bobby smiled.

'Good, because breakfast will be over for you, too if you don't get your ass up.' John said and vanished back into the kitchen. Bobby rubbed his eyes and thanked God that this had only been a nightmare and that he and John had left both, Magneto and the X-men, back at Alkali Lake.


End file.
